Glad the gloomier days passed. Things with my colleague seems much chirpier now. :)
Not that I have alot of colleagues to start off with. Which is the worse part. Being buay gum (reads: disputes or conflict) with 1 or 2 colleagues is almost being buay guam with the entire company. Having minor conflict with another can easily lead to even more serious cases like backstabbing and stuffs. Which is totally not necessary in a small company I'm in - where we work as a (small) team and each player is equally important.
So much for a someone equipped with social capabilities. Someone like me. Yes, I do offend people too. (As much as people offends me)
Truth is, I was feeling the shittiest when I did my January 3rd entry. Yes. The feeling of being ostracised is not acceptable. Even more unacceptable for me. I. Cannot. Be. Ostracised. Definitely not for that very reason why I had dispute with my colleague. I was merely stating the facts. Kill me if you want me to apologise. No way me, Lady Jinxed, would apologise for something that wasn't even wrong. And mind you, you can confront, and by all means, behave like a hypocritical muthafkr in front of me (hey, that's how the games are played in office man!), but never, never ostracise me.
So it's the usual, I walk this way, the colleague walk that way. The colleague see this direction, I look elsewhere. You avoid me, I avoid you.
Juvenile. Yes, adults can be highly childish too.
I eventually decided to ease the tension abit couple of days later. No use. The colleague act blur and continue ignoring. Not everyone has equal EQ. Mine could be higher that the colleague's? Kekekekeke.
And so? I ignored too. Saying "ignored" is not true. The fact that I looked cool about it doesn't mean I don't feel a single shit about it. I did my fair share of soul searching and mourning.
No, colleagues are not friends so it's not that kinda "why you no friend me?" mourn. It's more of a pep talk to encourage myself that says "Brace yourself, move on. You are the cause of what has happened so you find the solution to it. Either you make it or your break it."
But alas, when I was still in the not-so-happy state of mind, things turned out fine as if nothing happened before. Shitty as it seems, but at times, this is the best solution to avoid even more conflicts I feel.
Much as I don't find myself at fault, but I did learnt a lesson too. I've learnt yet another communication approach, to someone else. Just when I thought I'm someone proficient in communication, life always proved me wrong. And subtly warning me to constantly stay humble, lay low, and never stop learning.
Meeting lovelies Kym and Ting later! Kisses!
Ok love love,
Me
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